Posts

Showing posts from September, 2020

What would you do: WWJD?

Image
  Do you recall those infamous brackets: WWJD (What Would Jesus Do)? They come in just about every and any color, including tie-dye. I’m fairly certain that I went through a few of them. It was always interesting when, if you were the owner of such bracelet, you had apparently been given authority to correct and be the ‘moral police’. I am sure I was out and about ‘policing’.  The reality is I don’t quite think I even understood the things Jesus did. I mean at that point in my life I just imagined God our Heavenly Father sitting in the heavens, looking down to strike me down as soon as I messed up. It wasn’t until much later that I can to understand the sacrifice the Jesus made for me, and you. Death on a cross.  So even though the story is that God, sent His son to die. A wretched horrible death. I am a believer that had God wanted to he would have traded places, he did not want any pain to come to His child. Yet it had to be done.  Most of you who are reading are parents. Most of you

Day 7...God is in control

Image
  Of 28... Good morning everyone. I want to first give praise and honor to my Lord and savior. At the beginning of this week I knew not what to expect from our visits to the clinic, deciding to start new medicine and awaiting labs. God has been faithful.  ✅ we have had to use minimum of pain medicine (narcotics) ✅we get to prepare, and then actually give this chemo at home.  ✅ this evening will be day 7 of chemo, and overall Emerson has been tolerating      *this word tolerate (verb), defined as: be capable of continued subjection to (a drug, toxin, or environmental condition) without adverse reaction; allow the existence, occurrence, or practice of (something that one does not necessarily like or agree with) without interference.      -not sure how accurate that is. He has 🤮 during his dosing of chemo this evening. That was followed by episodes of explosive 💩.  Despite all of this. I believe we can all agree that Emerson is a fighter and my hero. ✅ a lot of resting is going on. Thou

New plan...God’s all along

Image
  Good morning everyone. I want to first that God for this day, and for the life of Emerson.  At the end of last week I felt the call or need to hold a prayer vigil for Mac. Now many of you have been praying earnestly since his diagnosis. Believe me there have been valleys and mountains, and we are grateful for your time spent before the Lord.  This past Sunday we had a call to prayer in front of our house, amlong with over 50 calls into a zoom meeting. Totally setting another one up! It was a joy to see so many people, but to also hear their prayers being lifted up. Knowing that our trust in you Lord has not changed despite the circumstances. Here is the update Elvin and I have decided to move forward with this trial chemo.  * Veneteclast...read about it I know this was through a lot of questions and research and through prayer. Right now it’s more about giving Emerson quality-of-life with minimum amount of pain. Currently his blast count is over 60%, and he has extramedullary symptom

Calling you to prayer

Image
  Prayer is defined as: a solemn request for help or expression of thanks addressed to God.  I have anchored myself in Christ for sometime, but I have created a foundation in which I care not to waiver during this storm. I am requesting a time to come to prayer. Of course I know many of you are praying on a daily basis. For that I’m beyond grateful a I am asking during this time to have an opportunity to come together. We have been given some unsettling news as of late. With Emerson’s leukemia presenting itself with pretty intense swelling to face and lesions to skin. We are currently in hospice care as well. Now the ideal position would be to cower in fear, and don’t get me wrong that has sounded like a very easy option many of times. We are still trusting God for a miracle, for His hands to be seen at work, for a word to be spoken. All in all, desiring for Gods will to be done.  Oh we’ve come this far by faith We know that in God’s word it says "do not be anxious about anything,

Brave Big Brother

Image
  I am honestly not even quite sure where to start.  You see today’s post is about my oldest, Emmanuel. I think every parent desires to see greatness in their children and for them to know that there sacrifice can be seen rooted in their lives from Jesus sacrifice for them. I’ve only always wanted for my kids to do amazing things. I mean I would say I’m a bit bias in saying that my kids are truly AMAZING! So as many of you know when Emerson’s leukemia returned we had to really meet up at the round table with the medical team. The discussion: transplant. There was possibility of it being me or manny. However, the re-induction chemotherapy did not destroy all cancer cells, and increased the risk of complications. This put talk of transplant on back burner as there was a tough decision on what mode of chemotherapy would be next. That’s when we were met with the 15 day course. At this point Mac is doing amazing. Although his numbers are still down, that is a good thing, and chemo has worke

Silence

Image
  Good evening. I have always held my standard on being honest when I write on the blog. It would only seem right that I wouldn’t begin to deviate from that.  So many of you, during this adventuring with Mac, don’t quite    know how I’m just pushing through. Many of you know that I’m anchored in my faith in Jesus. Though that may seem odd or just silly to many, as how could I have faith in someone I can’t see or feel. Ironically I have no idea where I would be had I not been walking with the Lord. Today has been a bit of a blur. But I will run through the important factors ✅ still have blast in the peripheral blood (from the labs drawn).      *blast are bad when they do not mature: currently we are in the 16%   ✅ swelling of head/bruising to eyes     *questionably related to leukemia     *plan to be seen by Dr. E (we have long history with him, as he took care of Mac soon after birth with the glaucoma) ✅ rash/lesions on head: could be related to leukemia as well     *biopsy (piece take

Good

Image
  Good evening. Today has first and foremost been a good day. I would like to acknowledge that even though there has been many days in which Emerson has had a bad day: symptoms wise. The days in and of itself were good. You see God breathers life into his lungs, and gave strength to his jaw so that he may still suckle and decisive nourishment from me (despite his stomach pains). The Lord granted him the ability to smile and hold onto my fingers.  All good things. Why not great? Well I’m reminded when God was creating this world, and all of its inhabitants when He completed a creation, He stated that ‘it is good.’ Now those were God’s words not mine. To think of how amazing all of His creations were, I believe to say good was most definitely an understatement. Yet I desire to see good despite the realities of what my son is living through and experiencing.  This past week has been such a blessing. I mean our previous week was really difficult with constant crying, or screaming. More rec