Complaining...STOP!

Definition of complaining: to express dissatisfaction or annoyance about something

I have learned to be aware of my thoughts and the words that come out of my mouth. During this time of social distancing and self-quarantine I have been made self aware.
As many of you know most hospitals have cut off visitor options. The exception is for parents, and actually only 1 is allowed a day (currently hubby is riding the bench with pending covid testing); and those who may be end of life they may have one visitor (*that does not include infected patients of covid-19). I digress...

After intrathecal today: I am not happy!

So as I have been solo, with no options of trading off it’s just been me and my little Big Mac. 

I have had a rough past 48 hours. Many of you know that Mac tested (-) for Covid-19, and I praise God for this. We are still not allowed into the hospital hallways, so my nurse has to warm my lunch and bring in items for Emerson. Everyone is required to wear mask, though not the N-95, due to his negative results. His numbers have finally began to improve. Though today he received his 3rd intrathecal (spinal) dose of chemo, so that means the next 48 hours will be watching him closely as he tends to have fevers during this period followed by intense vomiting by end of week. 
Now as you are glimpsing into my day, by the end I just want to put my pj’s on have a snuggle and get him to bed, before all the checks and infusions begin. But these past few nights have been tougher as Emerson has cried, often times without me being able to console him. During these moments I often want to just take a pillow and yell into it. Particularly in these last 2 days when this little guy basically refuses to take a nap longer than 10 minutes. You see if he is crying like he has, I normally have back up, but I’m solo. So I’ve left him cry before, but when your with a crying baby, who appears to be bothered by something but you have no rhyme or reason your just dumbfounded.  So as I quickly changed and returned to pick him up, as by now his poor little face is all red. I pick him up and hold him close, and as he nuzzles into my neck I shed some tears 😢. Mostly because as he takes a small sigh and begins to drift off, a part of me just hopes he knows how much I love him. 

Now I have attempted to make a grand effort not to complain since my son’s diagnosis. I will admit that when I’m lacking in the sleep department I am quite grumpy but honestly I want you to sit and think about your complaints

✳️Purchasing beyond what you need

✳️People continuing to gather despite stay @ home orders (that includes church gatherings)

✳️People going about coughing or sneezing on others (as if it’s a joke)

"Do everything without grumbling or arguing,"

Philippians‬ ‭2:14‬‬

✅My soon to be 10 month old son, Mac, has had 3 rounds of chemo, with an additional 2 pending. This means ☠️chemicals pouring into his bloodstream and brain to kill the cancer cells

✅My husband finally getting dream position to train with NOFD, to only get ill after 4 days. Now quarantined for the 11th day in our master bedroom.

✅My kids being loved on by mama Rosa (mil), who is now their Maestra (teacher); who currently have to speak to both me and their dad via FaceTime

✅Healthcare professionals putting their lives on the line to care for the sick

✅People dying and their family’s unable to be next to them, sometimes being seen taken their last breaths on FaceTime by their families

✅Some medical facilities having to choose which patients to save, as necessities are lacking

✅People have lost their jobs

 *worried about what they will eat, where they may sleep

The reality is this virus is killing people. Yet I’m not excluding the many of us in the hospital already with sick children, or adults who are ill for other reasons, all away from our family. 

So please stop complaining about being bored. Instead of watching another movie or binging another series...

✅Spend some time in God’s word: read it or use an audio version

✅Read a book

✅Create something

 *craft with your kid

*re-paint a shelf (with paint from your garage, you know you have a can)!

*go outside (be mindful your not congregating in large setting i.e. park)

Getting mask to protect my daddy

Rainbows

✅spring cleaning

✅write a letter or make a card

✅cook or bake something new

  *if you have kids include them, sure it will be messy but it’s worth it’ll

Father God, thank you for the sweet snuggles of my baby boy. Lord when we feel cornered with the unknowns of this world may we turn to you. It is so easy to complain, but as a believer we know you are provisional in all sorts of ways. May we be mindful and abide by guidelines that have been set up to protect us. Watch over and protect the health care workers and those who are selflessly giving of themselves.  May those who have been affected come to have a swift and speedy recovery. In Jesus name, amen

My baby sister, yep she is on the front lines: Jesus watch over her