You are Good

3 out of 5

"The Lord is good to those who wait for Him, to the person who seeks Him."

-‭‭Lamentations‬ ‭3:25

Long night.

So last night was a hard night. Can I be honest with you all. Despite all of my knowledge in medicine I find it hard to not have any control. I mean there was a part of me that was crying and screaming on the inside, while I tried to maintain my composure on the outside.

  The nurse had come in several times to assess his vitals and give medication. Suddenly I was awoken by some commotion. Emerson has been making some funny grunting sounds. Little history Mac has been grunting and snoring since birth, so initially I thought nothing of it. All of vitals, with the exception of his temperature were normal. Small reminder

Chemo can cause➡️ fevers

Immune compromised ➡️at risk for fever

So the on call team is called to assess him. Vitals are re-evaluates, exam is done. He continues to be mildly fluid overloaded to help with the tumor lysis. 

  However he is still making a grunting sound, as his nose is running a viral panel is checked. We manage to change him, feed him and get him back to sleep. For a moment though I had this fear that he couldn’t breath properly and I needed to make sure to pay close attention. So into my arms he went, sleeping he would go with a cool rag on his head to keep him cool. We came to find out that his nasal swab tested (+) human rhinovirus/enterovirus and parainfluenza virus4. 

  LYSIS is in full effect, it’s happening, which is good thing as the cancer cells are dying. For example lactase dehydrogenase is over 5,000, normal is under 260, think about it! Yet, by God’s grace Emerson’s overall his blood work is holding strong, outside of calcium needing to be replenished (@6.4)

For those of you who may understand how  important calcium is for our bones it is also an essential vitamin for our hearts electrical activity. So with it being low, he will have it replenished once he finished his treatment today. 

  For my Valley Baptist crew, please don’t make me read an EKG, you know that’s my kryptonite. 

Today has been an amazing day. Now I’m sure you may wonder how could she say such a thing. Well I will tell you this.

*God kept us through this diagnosis and start of treatment 

*The medication is doing its work without to many severe side effects

*Mac didn’t cry for 2 hours straight while receiving  second medication on his third day

*Emerson is smiling & eating his hands 

There are so many people who love us and are serving us in various capacities

I know,  and I am coming to understand that Emerson’s diagnosis is something that will live with us far from these past few days. Just the idea that my own child would ever be diagnosed with leukemia/cancer has been unfathomable. My faith in God is being tested, yes, but it will not be broken. So even though I can’t see what will come to be in the next days, weeks or months. Let alone the anticipation that my heart longs for to celebrate his first birthday. 

During this time the only thing I can do is seek God. What he is showing me is that waiting, though my flesh desires instantaneous, God will reveal to me when right. 

So how good do you think our great God is?

https://youtu.be/-jkMnq2Hfzo